They've taken away my license to thrill

Ah Wales, the sun, the countryside, the two bickering annoying children, clinging on to me and screaming in my ear. How blissful. Anyone who feels that they want to go ahead with the whole 2.4 children thing, come spend a day with my niece and nephew after chocolate for breakfast. There'll be screaming, there'll be fighting, there'll be swear words (not all mine) and many farts. Yes farts. Not quite the stress free life you may be planning for.

I too, am a fine example of how even after 29 years, you, as parents will never be rid of the traumas that your children can bring. Reducing my father to tears by driving to Wales with no MOT only to get here and discover my license had been revoked, so shouldn't have been driving at all really.... What a well turned out young lady I have grown up to be.

What does all this have to do with a single ladies lifestyle I hear you ask? Or more I visualise you shrug in a really non-committal sort of way, because you haven't really been reading this properly. Not a lot. But here is some stuff that is...

Have you ever stopped to think how much women do in their daily lives that is singularly for the benefit of men (don't worry this isn't turning into a man-hating-nineties-comedienne type rant). But seriously, do we not dress nice, wear perfume, put on make up for the man in our lives, the man we want to be in our lives or the potential we might meet a man who might want to be in our lives? I guarantee that if this world was made up of women only, there would no way we would bother to pluck, wax, shave ourselves in the semi sadomasochist way that we are prone to now. Don't get me wrong I have every intention of keeping up with these things, I am not a monster. I am not Julia Roberts.

But recently I have taken a sort of delight in these activities. I put make up on for me. I have made my legs smooth and lovely. For me. The other day I showered, dressed, put a book in my bag in order for a day in the park. No chance of communication with another human being and before I went, I sprayed myself with some perfume. For me. No one else could smell it. I think these simple acts of love for my own femininity have made me feel happy. Dare I say it? I will. I am happy.

Apart from the nieces and nephews and license revoking.....

Can't win them all. But at least you can smell nice.